The Shadow Within
There is a reactionary animal aspect within our nature – a dark, primal, chaos whose main concern is survival of the ego. It’s influence is felt in every uncharitable thought. This is the culprit for responses given in anger, aggressiveness, fear, desperation and feelings of unworthiness. It separates us from others and is responsible for all of our inhibitions, our hopelessness and our feelings of lovelessness.
The notion of a shadow part is repelling so you may wish to deny its existence. In fact, since most pride themselves on the thought that they are kind and caring; having a greater awareness of the shadow side of their personality is hugely wounding to the ego. Yet, to not intimately understand the triggers that cause you to behave in a non-loving fashion is to live in an imaginary vacuum, much as the ostrich with his head in the sand. To turn your head is to diminish the truest understanding of yourself and your world, and without this awareness, the full extension of your free will choices cannot be realized. In fact, if you consider a sunny day, a shadow occurs when beams of light shine from an angle. Shadows cannot exist independently; they require light.
Embracing the shadow self is also a progressive step on the spiritual path. It occurs through an investigation into our psyche, and leads to new discoveries and awareness. This exploration is daunting. To become intimately familiar with your being on all levels requires flinging the door wide to that shine light into the darkest corners. It’s a stripping bare of all the artifice you once hid behind. You many need to wrestle ancient demons of destructive thought patterning before a new truth is birth within. It is essential to ask yourself difficult questions and no matter how difficult it is, respond truthfully, then pay heed to your responses. This process will offer an education of your emotional triggers and allow you to realize methods to work with your emotional patterns in a non-destructive way.
The reward for this heart-wrenching effort is tenfold. You become more like the adult than the hiding child, for there will no longer be anything from which to hide. You will find yourself looking into the eyes of another with greater honesty, and your intuition for those with a hidden shadow side will become enhanced. A greater synchronicity occurs between your inner most self and the waking consciousness you present to the world. In addition, to plumb the depths of your own shadows is a humbling experience. As such, you will perceive the world and every encounter through eyes of compassion.
Aside from walking taller, speaking more lovingly and achieving a new sense of self, you will gain a fresh self-love for the unique, connected soul that IS you. Moving forward, a shift occurs in the type of energy and experience you let into your world. In short, you will no longer define yourself through outdated and overplayed emotional and mental patterns; you become more fully in touch with the now harmonious energy that is you. Lightened of burden, and clear in purpose, you will pursue your dreams with the vigor of youth.
This shadow aspect from which so many flee actually plays an important role in our totality – it offers the opportunity for us to step into our present as the most expansive, dimensional, compassionate being possible.
Janice, I did not read the whole article the first time. Truly makes you think. Sometimes the Shadow side is very painful. There is only one person in my life that makes me feel like the hurt child. Unfortunately it is the person that should make me feel the best. That is even harder to over come.
I really liked this article. I feel as though I am on a spiritual journey, but I din not know that there would be so much PAIN in doing so. I feel as though I will be able to handle any circumstance that may come my way, because nothing can bring out more pain then this journey that I am on. But I always like challenges, and I am used to fairing for myself. It makes you a stronger person in the end facing these chalenges, rather then turning away. My grand daughter calls me “Mom Mom Never Give UP!” I took this as a hugh compliment coming from someone that I love so dearly and 11 years old. The people that really love you are the ones who get you through the painful times of our life, and sometimes people have a great influence on us that we do not know so well ! Thanks for the info. Judy
(((Hi Judy)))
Thank you for taking the time to read my blog – I was actually a bit tired when I wrote it, and should have proof read better, AND understood how this board works before I published…I promise they will get better:) But at least you were able to gleen something from it, so I’m happy for you in that – and it’s a gift to me, as my hope is to encourage folks to think.
And yes, you sweet wonderful lady…I’m so sorry to agree with you on this point. The shadow side can be very painful…in fact, sometimes it even feels as if ‘the dark’ will completely swallow you up. But ya know…ignoring it? That doesn’t mean it goes away. It’s still there. The proverbial ‘monster in the closet’ … the place you never want to go, but that is always there, hovering in the background. And IT impedes your life in so many ways…how you interact with others, how you perceive yourself, how others perceive you…the choices you make…that ‘monster’ is impacting, whether you open the door or bolt it closed. Either way, you die inside. But when the door remains closed…you just continue to die inside, again and again and again without a resolution, until the day you finally DO open that door. So, the difference is really found in the future you COULD have, as opposed to the future you otherwise WILL have. It will get better – and it WILL be worth it. Hopefully you already comprehend the differences taking place within you just from the journey you have been on thus far…
And Judy, YOU are an amazingly powerful lady. You’ve been through so much in your life time, and I wonder if you realize how very impacting and beautiful you truly are – inside and out? You are kind, and generous and oh, SO good. So ‘out of the mouth of babes’! Your grand daughter is right – NEVER give up:o)
Just maybe breathe during the process as much as possible. Take baby steps along the way. Love yourself, and treat yourself as much as you can, in the little ways. BE with those who allow you to be who you are and feel loved as much as possible. Take your shoes off (when things warm up:) and ground your feet in the soil. Go to a nursery and breathe in the flowers.
In your last post, you were meditating…that’s PERFECT! In your next meditation, maybe try to envision a magnificent loving ball of energy floating towards you – maybe coming right to you…hovering over you…all sparkly and beautiful and your favorite color. Allow this ball to come in closer until it is touching your skin…envision it feeling warm and caring – like a real hug feels from a loved one. Imagine this ball as being a shield that will surround and protect you from angry words and hurtful comments.
For those comments are not truly about you – they are an exterior visual example of the turmoil taking place within someone else, and completely about that person – not you. And keep taking care of your health Judy, ok? Drink lots of water to flush out toxins…replenish the Vitamin D, Calcium, Magnesium…
Please know that I hear you, I think about you and you are loved. (((I’m closing my eyes and sending up prayers for healing right now.))))
Janice,
I absolutely agree… This process was one that helped me tremendously… I do have a question if you don’t mind
I feel like I am in an on-going process with this. Do you find that we need to wander to this self-evaluation place at different times through out our journey?
Thank you much for sharing this today.
Much love
Great Question! (And thank you kindly for taking the time to read my post…ESPECIALLY this one since it was a bit rough around the edges:)
Ok…What immediately comes to mind to me is a new dancer who continues dancing throughout their life.
This is someone who walks into the studio, head down, a bit hunched over, and heavy footed. They learned to walk that way in their youth…they were brow beaten by family members and classmates and this natural pattern became more ingrained with time. In addition, their emotional being, friends, life experiences seem to mirror the image their gait portrays.
For whatever reason, they’ve finally gotten to a place…quite often out of a sense of desperation or a need for, what feels like, survival itself… where they are ready to break free – turn the page on that chapter in their life. And in this case, the person decides the way to do that, is to learn to dance…experience the joy of rhythm and movement.
Now, this doesn’t happen overnight…there’s a process/progression. They find that they need to not only learn the BASIC dance steps, but relearn basics about themselves (their body) which at this point are actually unconscious movement/behavior (their slumped shoulders/downcast eyes).
This is hard stuff. The initial new footwork is being created; (basics in dance) while old body habits are being shattered and new patterns are forming. Every time they slump, ‘the bell’ in the form of the teacher says ‘Stand up straight’. Every time they look down,’ the bell’ in the form of the teacher says, ‘Look directly at your partner’. Etc.
With time, and patience and practice, that new pattern carries off the floor. Now the dancer stands straighter, and looks peeps in the eye.
Does she revisit the ‘shadow’? Sure. If someone makes her feel badly, yes, she looks down. Or slumps… BUT due to her re-patterning, (growth through awareness) now she hears ‘the bell’/teacher in her head saying ‘Stand up straight’ etc., and she alters her body.
Now that she is experiencing a shift, she carries herself in a way that conveys a self confidence – this alters the perception she gives to the world…and alters the manner in which folks treat her – which feeds/sends energy/cycles back to her in a positive way.
And every time she learns a difficult dance maneuver, her dance basics come into play. And no matter how many dance lessons she takes, she is always willing to refresh her basics…she even needs to do so! Only now, each time she takes a class in those basic dance moves and dance etiquette, she views the movement through an enhanced awareness. ‘Ah! So THAT’S why we do that!’ Each time her education and learning expands, she perceives those same basics through a more expansive filter. Learning is cyclical. Enhanced learning adds more and more expansive layers to our understanding… much as an onion.
Part of the responsibility of a mystic is ABOUT learning what ‘the bells’ are, and maintaining a conscious awareness – checking oneself – the continuous awakening.
The dancers who say, ‘Oh, guffaw! I don’t need a class in basics!’ are the very ones who become sloppy on the floor. To be humble enough to cycle back is to truly desire to grow. The day we think we have it all figured out is the day we stop learning. What was it Einstein said? Something like, ‘Those who think they have the answers are in for the greatest awakenings.’
Just my wee thoughts:O) Hope they help.
(((Much love, blessings and hugs to you))))
Thank you Janice. I appreciate you taking the time to write a response that feeds my need of an example to be able to compare and comprehend
Many Hugs and Blessings!
((Heya Donna:))) No, I thank YOU and appreciate your willingness to participate in this interaction. I really hope it helped a bit. Think of the steps toward uncovering these deeper aspects as ‘the tipping point’ to the rest of your life. It’s heart-wrenching but SO priceless in the long run… :O) ((((Blessings)))
of course, i had to read it and it is all so true, especially the constant observance. and i am wondering how you are! i think it would be interesting for people to also write about the power and transformation within the shadow, the aspects of the self that remain abandoned, such as my client today, who unconsciously identified with her dominating father, so was not asserting herself in her singing career. Or, and this would very misunderstood, the appropriate necessity of murder.
Schiffer publishing bought my book, within the power of universal mind, three weeks ago! I am working with my business partner who is a psychic artist and she created the Source Deck. I can’t wait to express my ideas. We finally refined it to a new psychology of universal mind. All is rapidly changing and i am now doing a lot of events across the country, will be in Atlanta and Birmingham this year as well as doing a retreat in Costa Rica. I am really tired and always trying to balance my life, doing the book (have to code it and reedit for publication is wiping us out!) Are you publishing your articles elsewhere? Holistic publications? I have a fairly current list you can send them to. If you like it, let me know, I would love to know how you are, you are a blessing to the world! love you, Rochelle
(((Hey There Rochelle)))
It’s such a joy to hear how well you are doing:O) Schiffer Publishing bought your book!??! Awh, congratulations!! I’m so proud for you! It was bound to happen…you’ve been working so hard for such a long time…looks as if you ladies are truly on your way!
And I’m looing forward to reading your book!! The title is fabulous. Plus a Source deck? What a cool idea – goodness you’ve been busy:)
Thank you, especially with your crazy schedule these days, for spending your valuable time by reading my little blog:O) There’s SO much more I wanted to write!! Maybe I’ll do a few follow-ups…this is a new place for my writing, and I wasn’t sure how lengthy a blog should be? My thought was that shorter was better. Not so sure that is accurate? Ha!! I’m learning as I go:O)
I’ve been working on a project, so my books are on a back burner for a bit. My articles are only available on a few sites I joined, so it would be a wonderful asset to have a copy of your list of holistic publication!!! THANK YOU for that too. Rochelle, you are always so wonderfully supportive of my work – I’m grateful for that. If I can ever be of assistance to you; all you have to do is ask.
(((Hugs to you, your hubby and daughter and Courtney))))